talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
