There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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