Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
