Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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