She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I showed him my bush... on skype.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
