No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Houston, we have a blender
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
