Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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