I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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