I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
he shaved USA in his pubs
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
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