"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
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