This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
