Michael Bay diarrhea
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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