You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
