My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
