what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
