Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
