It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Also, beer. Big fan.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
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