You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize