Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Randomize
