You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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