sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
