I'm sorry my penis didn't work
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
