Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
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