My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
