Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
