He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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