if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
