paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
