It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
