It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize