Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
