Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
