Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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