Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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