Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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