just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
