I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
