I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
Randomize
