but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Randomize
