hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Randomize
