somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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