Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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