i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize