So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
