i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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