Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
