i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
