white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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