I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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