At least make sure they are 18
Why
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
