We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
So gin and wine won't be happening again
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
