found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i just google imaged poop.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize